Sunday, November 30, 2014

Respect

BuNi

only finds respect for those who work as hard as she does. Getting up at 3 in the morning for a 5am shift.

The Scandinavian blonde, who pissed in the bushes and then tried to make friends with her to hide from the cops, and confessed an addiction to cocaine.

She almost helped her or felt sorry.  "But in the morning, I will be sober," and you will still be beautiful.

Under the Bridge/Don't Give Up combine to form the other part of the story.  All those lost souls, collected in survival under the bridge. (Something to explore safely when there are none in sight)

Sunday, August 31, 2014

Pictures of The Awful Bedroom NIGHT

He found himself showering twice a week. If that.
He enjoyed his own musk; nevertheless, he maintained basic cleanliness. And no one else seemed to mention his musk one way or another.
Living with his stuff in piles, he tried to categorize things by oftenness of use. Nevertheless, everything he needed everyday was always packed away.





Grand Central Ghosts April 30

Grand Central Ghosts
Started 4/30/14
EMMETT at 24, skipped college (?) living in NYC
Determined to stay
(All my friends would LAUGH at me.  Or my teachers, THIS is where you landed??)

==
This is where bitterness starts
Ideas lost to sleep
And dreams lost to waking
13 hours in a back broken bed
Catching up from yesterday
And hoping to invest in tomorrows REM


Nothing can match
3am Self hatred


Idea for paralleled monologues
As one train goes by
And one passenger sees the light
Baryshnikov and Willem Defoe
And the lust toward making good theater
Vs envy from Stubborn Tongue
At the New Ohio!!
Sound of breaking glass, on 72nd st
I stopped writing plays for 10 years!!


Men in too much cologne
And sleepy slumps of men
4am
Scent of unwashed, tired, poor
Humanity
Blocking out the light
Assault on the senses
Subways too loud too late
Or too early
Cackling roommate
Who cant close her door
2 bedroom turned to 3
Separated by plywood and a blanket


The April of no spring
No lilacs
No letter to my Ghost Father
Asking for advice


The arches
And blue sparks from the tracks
Lighting up the steal beams
Of a building in bloom


Get a little job
How little the bites are
That take away sleep
Rest
Shower, flowing water
Contentment
Silence
Good judgement
Friends


And finally
Can't switch shifts
Have to ask around


Who is the Shift Suprrvisor and why does everyone else have the authority to boss me around??


"Everything is about time"


==
Break at 6:30?  Really? When I just started at 5?
Why is it still cold?
And raining. regressing to Spring/Winter/FALL


==
After shift ends at 10:45, Special entrance to the subway/GCT
51 Madison Ave? (but it’s on 42nd st!!)


Run to Actor’s Fund
Nobody knows how to turn on computers
“Teamwork makes the dream work”


Tall Sark
Tall bold
Talk blonde
Blonde floor


Seeing shit at the end of the day
Oh great
My friend
(And just when I started to get regular in the mornings. and now I can’t go to the bathroom)
Ha! Whoever THAT was can do it ANYWHERE!
He’s got more freedom than ME!


Above the Bridge? GWB
Don't give up!!


The black men, hunched over at 3 in the morning
Aching from lack of sleep

SONG!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBqbNkSdPiQ&feature=kp

4:44am He Sees Himself as the Homeless Guy

He sees himself as the homeless guy!
Thanks the cops
Bc the smelly guys scare him
When they speak
So insistently
And then he showers
2x a week
Tries to cover up at first
Gives up
You can only smell him up lose
And nobody comes close to him
Subway workers keep their flashlights on
Too hard to turn them off!
Parallel to their legs
Hanging off a loop
Maybe it's self hatred that brings him to a job at 4am
He's a martyr
And good enough not to tell anyone
Or expect them to give him pity
Or allow him to complain
Gives him plenty of reasons to hate the world
All caps!
Carolyn
His rich sister/ GF
Expecting to be entertained
In any conversations he showsup to
He knows he can get in
By joking about cute furry animals
She went to MIT
And the only change has been from
Teddy bears to polar bears
She is using her consulting fees
"Consulting has been very very kind to me"
"Most people our age haven't paid off their mortgage, or saved for retirement"
And I'm just like, Really???
She may be book smart, but she never learned sensitivity.
The Most Glorious Thing in his life
Was sitting on the train at 125th st
Watching it emerge from the underground
The steel arches of the West Side Highway
A parking lot of traffic at all hours
(until he realized there was parking there)
Reminders of going grocery shopping there
Abundance of fresh fruit
And love
And now, the blue sparks from the train at night
Off the new construction
A skeleton of steel
Would it last as long as that bridge
Or the palisades?
Or the sunlight?
(which didn't last long enough for him
After college, after being told how smart he was
And not being able to find a job
Cursed?
Stupid?
Everyone told him to get work
"even if it's just in a coffee shop"
As if money prevents you from going insane
Or the American idea
Of noble work
He had never felt more suicidal
He had tasted life of the mind
Parties where he was witty
And jobs where he led meetings
Now he was being yelled at for not moving
For not frenetically cleaning in every spare moment
Or at least trying o look busy
The spring without lilacs
Walking to work in the freezing rain

11:25am Happy?

Poem
What makes me Happy?
Coffee & Jazz
Sitting and SHITTING


Homeless Guy
asking for water

==
Also
Dressing Room of basses
Ella Vocal Competition
Doppelgangers!

Break
Pictures of the sidewalk in front of the NYPL

Hard Wired for Narrative/iphone notes/BuNI

Hard Wired for Narrative (name of doc)

Friday night, May 2, 2014, 11:30pm


Writing:


FIRST MEETING OF BUNI:
Emmett begins to wander the forest of Central Park in the dark.


He had thought he had known it inside and out; all its paths had been familiar to him his whole life.  But somehow he only noticed NOW that he had always been led, had always followed someone else who knew the way.  


He had fallen asleep in the late afternoon, and his sense of direction was lost with the sun.  


Streetlights lit up some areas of the paths, but not where he was.  He could make out some light just above the trees, maybe a streetlight, maybe a moon,  He was scared, and focused on the sound of his shoes on pavement, aware of the change to dull thuds when he wandered onto a dirt path.


Finally, he heard more noises, saw more lights, and wandered out into a real street. There were no cars, which was not unusual in the middle of the night, but he did not think it was the middle of the night.


He wandered, trying to figure out the time, trying to figure out how to figure out the time.  He had no watch, and there was nobody around to help him figure out the time.  He kept walking on the sidewalk opposite to the park.  Not wanting to get too far away from his known territory, afraid to wander too far into the city with none of his wits about him.  It was foggy and he didn’t recognize the neighborhood at all.


On the next corner was a deli.  Or a bodega.  Or a newsstand. It was a store with lights on, anyway.  He figured it was the best place to locate a human.  He was pretty sure it was closer (or beyond) the middle of the night and lights seemed welcoming to him.


Or at least provided a hint, pointing him to someone who might know what time it was.


==
iphone
April 30th, 5;17pm
Buni
She was some flavor of something
He was various flavors of European
Just enough thrown in to make him pass for Indian or PR or
It was a clever enough thing to say, and he got to use his new favorite eloquent phrase, but he wanted to be friends with her.
Which meant he'd have to work on getting a new favorite phrase, maybe a new one every week!
If they were going to be friends & he was gonna keep impressing her, he'd have to work harder.
This only felt like an achievement on his part, I'd she was going to make him more interesting, them it wasn't manipulation
Especially if it was just him doing the manipulation on himself

Sent from my iPhone


==
May 1, 11:56pm
After JALC Gala
Em
Buni/amber
Arrogant cousin?
Lance/gardener
Columbus wearing a garland of flowers!!!
Cent park
GWB
Columbus Circle
Grand Central


My mind fills in the spaces in between sounds
Subway clicking
Bad apartment alley
Clicking
Sounds like a tennis game
Fire Alarm battery Shrieks in hallway
Does he live in a bad apartment
Or an art studio
Or does he go from one to Ye other?


It was only when he was falling that he decided he should have never stepped off the bridge
Umbrella canopy!!
He had spent the greater part of the sunset, just pacing back & forth on the bridge.
And not looking down.


Entitled shoppers in
Starbucks
While foods
Amber & Schsllers
Humanity one at a time
Vs anyone with a mean voice
I am the one who bestowsgum on the lost, normal objects transform into
Magic!!!
Buni & Ynfer the bridge
Don't give up
City lights like ginger sle
Graphic novel


Toss food
Hate Schaller weber
Flat plate
Round as bowl salad
Defying physics
Organic waste/compost idea
To save food from Starbucks and
Gala dinners
Gardening
Large plate small food
Gobo shaking
Someone on catwalk


Sent from my iPhone


==


May 1, 4:40AM
During morning commute to Starbucks
Dark people with light eyes
Pigeons trapped in the subway
Did they take the elevator?
Desperate to stay together
Like with like
The man speaking a Spanish he doesn't understand
"La pierna"
Probably injured
The homeless hump snores
And wakes himself up
Funny for the first time
Giant upside down roach in the Lark Theater company
Fancy places have them too
Me and my mosquito
I believe there is
"Dignity in all work"


Sent from my iPhone
==
Ap 30, 5:17pm, Wed


My Brain is Hard Wired for Narrative
Dream during Jalc
Mandela Jazz
Playing inside a pail for the sea
Found a large white dog
Large for a Matchbox car
And found a little boy to be out hero
Put him on the inside edge of the pail
He didn't think that was bad.
Surrounded him with a crowd of other toys
Elephants on keychains, smaller than he was
He didn't think that was bad at all.
In fact, he thought it was quite good!
He created a little world for the boy and the elephants and the giant white dog

Sent from my iPhone
==
Ap 26 9;59pm
Allen Room at Linc Center


At least they dance
Working the Allen Room at Jazz at Lincoln Center
We're being upstaged by MYC
And the sunset
And the rainbow!!
Late april
1 drummer
One percussion
3 backup singers
1 upright bass
1 electric
1 guitar
1 sax
Lynda Carter
Even the ushers were dancing
The last 2 songs the audience got up
No longer was it his history
Or listening to the sound of her voice
It was connection!!
With plenty of money
He took a drink of water
While he was supposed to be singing
And then, when everyone got the joke
She took a drink of water
Who was doing the old man voice??


The way the subways blue sparks
Light up the steel building skeleton
Just after 125th street on the 1
When it goes above ground
And she remembers Fairway
And the tall blonde beautiful man
And the 20 foot tall bike
Under the hundred year old silver arches
That frame the Westside Highway
And the Hudson
Glaubierne
And his smile


Sent from my iPhone


==
When Ballet Resembles Ohio
Ap 24, 10:57pm
Subway from Dance Theater Harlem
And Michael Finestein!!
The sound of air, carpenters working, sounds tossed away,
Moments pass without notice, the sawed off bit falls to the floor. The very air is sawdust.


The echo of not even the walls listening.


And then the spell.
Everything reverberates
Like it would in church
If you dropped the cslice
Bernsteins Mass
"It is blood. His blood"


The sound of sound.
The lights, burnished
Over dramatized
Yellows or blues


(And all I see coming home
Are the steel arches
And I remember Fairway)


Electronic sound,
Reminding us of the 80's
Lyons scar from the mugging
Back when Soho then
Was WaHi now.
Was Brooklyn now.
Was my every new cheap neighborhood
Now.


Metal clattering.
The very sound of sound.
Treasuring it
Burnishing it
Polishing it
Making it into a pearl.
Crafting like an oyster
Or polishing a stone
By keeping it I your mouth
While you are a soldier
In Vietnam
Carrying all these things with you
Until they become
Glorified versions of themselves
And you

Sent from my iPhone


==
Pennies from heaven


Just when I think my luck runs out
I see another one
Shining up at me
Smiling
A wink
Like the gracefulness of pigeons
When they think nobody is looking


The holy dust that has coated the city since 9/11
Our office ancestors are always all around us



Sent from my iPhone